time to nurture

I FOUND out this week that THREE of my friends are scheduled for surgery in the next ten days. Ouch! Surgery is always the pits. The first lovely friend went in yesterday and is safe and sound and on the mend, thank goodness. But this calls for a seriously nurturing get-well care package.

MY FIRST order of business was to bake her favorite Homemade Almond Granola. It’s nourishing and delicious and just a tad sweet. Next I added some Nourishing Tonic and Tummy Teas from Rebecca’s Herbal Apothecary to the care package. Rebecca’s is a Boulder staple and I have trusted them over the years to recommend the safest and most beneficial blends for what ails you. They are truly a wonderful resource. These two were chosen for general nourishing support and to help the post-anesthesia yucky belly. I also popped in a little heart-shaped tea infuser (an extra dose of love!) and some unscented lip balm for those dry surgery lips (boo!). I always try for neutral or unscented things for people who are unwell or recovering in case they’re feeling extra sensitive. There’s nothing worse than an overpowering scent to turn your stomach when you’re feeling queasy. And lastly, a pair of super duper cozy Le Bon Shoppe Cloud Socks from Jones + Co. to warm up those frozen toes (I was given some for my birthday and they’re heavenly). I wrapped it all up in a pretty little package, added a sweet note of encouragement and delivered it to her door.

IT’S SOMETIMES hard to know what friends need during or after an event like surgery, treatment or illness. If you know them well, just ask! They might have an answer for you. But sometimes people just don’t know what they need or can’t think about one more thing. Or maybe you don’t know the person well, but want to lend some support. Whatever the case, having been through several surgeries myself, I know that you can’t go wrong with comfy socks or slippers, extra nourishing food or drink, a cozy blanket (read my whole ode to blankets), gentle unscented self-care items and a heartfelt note.

AND IF baking homemade treats and gathering all the contents of a care package isn't on your agenda or your special people are out of town, my lovely friends at MEND have you covered. Their beautiful Wellness Packages were created with loved ones in mind who are “facing, fighting or recovering from cancer,” but I have sent them as perfect, lovely sympathy and get-well gifts, too. They are beautifully and thoughtfully curated and can be tailored to your special person. Plus they mail them direct with a hand-written note, which is amazing for far-away loved ones who need heartfelt support. Use code FLUTTER for 15% off your order.

WHICHEVER gifting path you choose, sharing your time and your heart and your good mojo will go a long way toward helping your special people feel supported while they heal. I’ve included a few other ideas below in case you love someone who could use some nurturing. Be well. xo

// 1. These Le Bon Shoppe Cloud Socks from Jones + Co. are seriously divine // 2. Beautiful MEND Wellness Packages are a perfect solution // 3. Rebecca’s Tummy Tea will help sooth an out-of-whack digestive system // 4. These gorgeous handmade hot water bottle covers and a hot water bottle from Wildflower Nation would be so soothing // 5. I’ve been eyeing these Topdrawer Reversible House Shoes for keeping myself cozy! // 6. This pretty T2 tea infusing mug will make the perfect cuppa // 7. These Hansel from Basel Sweatshirt Socks from Anthropologie look heavenly // 8. Dr. Bronner’s Organic Naked Lip Balm is super simple and my absolute favorite // xo

MORE IN… support + sympathy

lost love // pet sympathy

IN A YEAR filled with so much unspeakable suffering and loss, it feels almost trite to mourn so deeply the loss of a pet. But our sweet Murray dog was by our side, day in and day out for 13 years. He was our first baby, our fur baby and unbeknownst to him, the funniest member of our family (by far the naughtiest of all of my boys too, but we’ll forgive him that).

HE HAD a super amazing giant, toothy grin that brought a smile to everyone who witnessed it; even the grouchiest strangers couldn’t keep a straight face. He did the very best happy dance for FAR longer than was called for so that even a random plumber left feeling like the king of the universe. He once snatched an entire homemade apple pie off the counter mid-Thanksgiving dinner and devoured the whole thing. As a pup, he hopped onto my mother-in-law’s dining room table and drank a full glass of sauvignon blanc. He used to ever-so-gently nibble each individual raspberry off of our backyard bushes until they were gone. He snored loudly. He tooted a lot. In his golden years, he started gently plucking just the eyeballs out of every stuffed animal in the house. He always settled himself in one of our boys’ rooms at bedtime to watch over them both until he was sure they were asleep.

AND IN early December, on a sunny Tuesday, we learned that our seemingly healthy aging pup had an aggressive tumor that couldn’t be helped. A mere 4 days later we had to let him go. It was much too quick and much too soon and it absolutely gutted me. My heart was in pieces. I have ugly cried at the drop of a hat for a month straight. My poor boys still give me a glance anytime his name is mentioned to see if I’m going to burst into heaving sobs. I know all of you pet lovers out there feel me. He would’ve been 13 on Christmas day and we thought we had at least another 2 good years with our funny old guy.

THANK GOODNESS dear friends reminded me that I have full permission to mourn as deeply as I need to despite anyone else’s suffering, and so I have. Dear friends also gave us the most heartfelt and lovely gifts to commemorate our beloved pooch and I’ll always cherish them, in part because they so beautifully honor our guy, but also as a reminder of the awesome, loving community that we’re surrounded with.

ONE FRIEND brought us a tiny sneaker with Murray’s name on it because she’ll always remember him dancing around with a shoe gently clutched in his jaws, trying to smile wide with a mouth full of rubber. Another brought us gorgeous, personalized wind chimes that are meant to remind us that he’s always nearby. My boys made ornaments with his picture on them just hours after he passed as a way to deal with the grief and I’ll treasure them forever. Another dear friend’s incredibly talented daughter drew a stunning, tender portrait of Murray that so beautifully captures him that I just want to hug it. We were given personalized ornaments and drawings and flowers and deeply heartfelt notes. They are such a gift in every sense of the word.

MY UGLY crying episodes are fewer and further between these days, but the hole in my heart is still gaping and I don’t expect it to fill anytime soon. I will learn to live with it and hopefully one day will be able to smile and well up with sweet memories instead of a torrent of tears when I feel it. In the meantime, I made a little Murray shrine on the messy board where I keep little treasures so that I can see him every time I pass by.

BELOW ARE some ideas for lovely things that commemorate lost loved fur babies in case you love someone who could use one. Etsy is an amazing resource for these kinds of special, personal gifts. Your own handmade gifts are also incredibly heartfelt (garden stones, drawings or paintings, kind notes). For our own part, we made a donation to our local humane society in Murray’s name; you could do the same to a similar organization that rescues or cares for animals. If you’ve given or received other things that touched your heart, please leave a note and tell us about it. And hug your pups extra tight today for me. xo

1. Sweet custom painting of your pooch on a sliced wood ornament via Etsy // 2. The personalized sneaker we were given via Etsy // 3. Pretty “look for me in the rainbows” prism sun-catcher via Etsy // 4. Custom foiled portrait via Etsy // 5. Crown & Paw custom canvases are a sweet, lighthearted way to commemorate your pup // 6. As are these West & Willow custom portraits // 7. Hand-poured personalized garden stone via Etsy // 8. Handmade embroidery hoop “portrait” // 9. Proceeds from this “I hear you in the wind” chime feeds shelter dogs // 10. Personalized silver ring // 11. Super sweet felt ornament via Etsy // 12. The Trees Remember will plant a tree in a national forest in your doggie’s name // xo

gratitude for 2020

My sweet husband gave me this stunning MQuan New Sun Marigold Incense Burner for Christmas (lucky gal, right?!). I love her gorgeous work and the intention it’s made with. He also included some absolutely beautiful Incausa Palo Santo incense. Today seemed like the perfect day to smudge the whole house; to clear away any negative juju and to invite the fresh, powerful, positive energy that I hope to bring into the new year. Goodness knows there has been enough weird juju this year to last us a loooong time and I wanted it out.

While I do share in the “good riddance” sentiment to a year of unspeakable suffering by so many for so many reasons, I have found myself more grateful to my core this year than maybe any other of my life. And some of the things I feel most grateful for are the direct result of our being forced to slow down, to keep it close and to find new rhythms to our days.

- I love that I get to hug my husband at lunchtime each day instead of scheduling business meetings with each other to compare busy calendars.

- I love that I got to see the look on my littlest’s face when the big concept of multiplication clicked in his little brain during our afternoon math sessions.

- I love listening to my older son’s genuine, unselfconscious belly laughter during online small groups when no teacher is monitoring.

- I love that I got to spend almost every moment of the last 9 months of my sweet pooch’s life by his side instead of leaving him behind while we raced around.

- I love that I’ve deepened friendships, some old and dear and some new. Shared experiences, even at a distance, create such strong bonds that even “new” friends now know my heart even though we’ve never even shared a meal.

- I love that in all of the chaos, I found space in my brain and heart to start a new business to create an outlet for my passions and that lovely people actually responded.

So I will DEF welcome more “normal” times and can’t wait to hug my parents and entertain friends + family indoors and travel the world and see my sister IRL, but I hope some of what we learned to appreciate in 2020 will stay with us.

Here’s to another hopeful trip around the sun. May it be filled with health, joy, adventure and love for you all. And please leave a note to tell me what little (or big!) 2020 adjustments you hope to cling to in the new year.

I’ve also included some resources for gorgeous smudging supplies if you want to try it in your home, too (note: you don’t have to use Palo Santo; white sage is also popular for smudging, I just prefer the smell of Palo Santo. Read this Lonny article to find out which might be best for your space and intention). Whichever you prefer, any of these beauties would make stunning gifts for anyone who might like to invite some good juju into their life. xo

1. Stunning minimalist Bodha brass incense burner from Jones + Co // 2. Incausa Stonewear Clay Incense Burner from Cedar & Hyde // 3. Sounds sustainably harvested Palo Santo sticks from Morningtide // 4. AA grade Palo Santo sticks respectfully collected in Peru via Etsy // 5. Crescent Incense Burner by Michele Quan // 6. Incausa Breu Resin Incense Parcel // 7. Catherine Rising Floral Smudge Stick from Jones + Co. // 8. Incausa Palo Santo Wood Incense Bricks from Cedar & Hyde // xo

a gift-giving "ism"

I COME by my love for gift-giving honestly. My mom is the original over-the-top spreader of joy and through the years it just rubbed off on me. Some of my sweetest memories from childhood are of the birthday cakes that she used to crowd with tiny trinkets and toys, ever mindful of whatever theme she’d perfectly chosen for my celebration. I absolutely loved them, they made me feel so special and I couldn’t wait every year to find out what she’d surprise me with. And now I subject my boys to the same deluge of cheer, it’s just so much fun and I hope someday they have the same sense that their mama loved them sooo much that I went extra mile to make them feel extra special. I can’t help it. It’s a learned behavior.

ANOTHER of my mom’s gift-giving “isms'" is that you should never give someone a bag with nothing in it. Not a handbag, a pencil case, a coin purse, a backpack or briefcase. Any vessel she’s ever given has had a treasure inside for a double layer of surprise and delight. And so I too have adopted this sweet practice. Sometimes it’s another whole serious gift, but sometimes it’s just a sweet note, tiny felt heart, mini milagro or charm, favorite candy, worry doll, pet rock or a homemade bauble. And the unexpected surprise always brings a smile. After all, that’s what gift-giving is all about, right? So next time you choose a bag of any kind for your special people, take a few extra minutes to sneak something inside and watch the joy rise to the next level. Thanks mom for always taking the extra few minutes, especially when you didn’t have them to spare. I definitely felt the love. GIFT A LITTLE HAPPINESS. xo

1. Bright little handmade Felt Hearts / 2. Ooly’s mini Pocket Pal Journals / 3. Mini Milagro Heart Charms / 4. Tiny handmade Worry Dolls / 5. Handmade Ceramic Hearts / 6. Multi-colored ceramic Heart Tiles / 7. Ooly has tons of Cute Erasers / 8. Lily Lolo Lip Gloss / 9. Meri Meri adorable Hair Clips / 10. These Haribo Roulettes are my SIL’s favorite / 11. Cutie Mini Monster Highlighters / 12. Use these adorable Smile Emoji Beads to make something special.

MORE IN… kids + teens

it’s the little things

MY YOUNGEST had an assignment to write 10 small things he could do to make positive change in the world. Goodness knows we could all use a little good mojo right now, so it got me thinking about some easy things I could do to put some positive energy out there to balance out the downright strange vibes that are swirling around. Please add your ideas, too! We could all use a little encouragement right now. Peace, lovelies. GIFT A LITTLE HAPPINESS. xo

+ Roll your neighbor’s trash can out to the street on trash day

+ Decorate and send a sweet note in the mail just because

+ Bake a little treat for a friend and wrap it up like a present

+ Offer to pick up groceries for someone who could use a hand

+ Send flowers to your mom for no reason

+ Tell a teacher how much you appreciate their efforts - it is so meaningful, especially now

+ Pick up a stranded bag of dog poop on the trail or sidewalk

+ Leave a nice note or small surprise for your mail carrier and/or delivery driver

+ Tip your local restaurant or coffee shop peeps way more than you normally would

+ Smile with your eyes at strangers - Tyra Banks can totally teach you how :)

HERE ARE a few other things that are making me feel happy this week. I hope they make you smile, too…

// 1. I am beyond happy that these still exist. I have been hoarding some from my childhood collection and now I can use them! Locals can ogle the rolls IRL at Two Hands Paperie on Pearl Street // 2. These gorgeous tinies make me want to be a better baker. Or would it be weird to glue sprinkles to my wall?! // 3. This is a super nourishing go-to family favorite, perfect for a day when comfort food fits the bill // 4. My new washi tape set is an amazing addition to a growing collection // xo

MORE IN… kids + teens